Success Stories
Message from YCS (Youth Consultation Services)
HOLLEY SUCCESS STORY
SHELTER OUR SISTERS CLIENT STORIES
NCJW / BCS Thrift Shop Gift Cards
It's hard to imagine a more positive response than the one CFA has received in conjunction with the NCJW's generous donation of $50 gift cards to their thrift shop in Bergenfield. While everyone has been thankful for the opportunity to meet the wonderful, helpfulstaff at the store there have been a few that are quite touching.
- One woman in her 50's lost everything--her apartment, clothing,furniture--to a bedbug infestation in her complex. She literally had to move with nothing. She was extremely happy to receive the $50 gift card and called to relate how she was able to pick up, not only clothing, but some household items as well.
- A couple in their 50's recently lost their jobs and were having a difficult time making ends meet. While CFA was able to assist with some issues, their main concern was that the woman's 87 year old mother would be celebrating her birthday with no actual "celebration" because there was no money left after the bills were paid. The family was very sad because Mom had never forgotten an occasion and was always there when they needed her. Since Mom had always sacrificed for her family she often went without. She needed clothes and myriad other items. The gift card enabled them to ensure that Mom had a great birthday--and the couple was also able to purchase items they desperately needed for themselves.
- Another client with many health problems--rheumatoid arthritis, Parkinson's disease and early onset dementia, among them--was also able to put the gift card to good use. Her income consists of SSD only and she was able to browse and buy items she would not normally be able to afford. She was very specific in mentioning how helpful and friendly she found the staff.
There have also been instances of young families being able to ease the burden of shopping at expensive malls by being able to go to the store and purchase needed items. Even the children have been happy to go on an excursion and buy something without being told "No, it's too expensive". The impact of this program on people who are trying to make the best of this difficult economy is simple to measure. It makes them happy and gives them hope that, even if the times are tough, there are people who care and who are willing to help in a very meaningful way.
Message from YCS (Youth Consultation Services)
NCJW BCS volunteers work with Holley to assist mother and daughter make a new life together
"Angela" is a six-year-old girl with long dark curls and sunny smile. While Angela’s mother was an abused child herself, she did her best to care for her daughter. Sadly, her mother’s drug use eventually made it impossible for her take proper care of Angela – whose severe mental health issues and developmental delays left her unable to even dress or feed herself. Angela came to the Youth Consultation Services Holley Center and her mother went into a drug rehabilitation program.
The YCS team spent a great deal of time with Angela, giving her the attention and structure that her mother simply could not. As Angela began to learn and grow, YCS began working with Angela’s mother as well. She had successfully completed her program so she could now be a part of Angela’s therapy and the two received counseling together. Both mother and daughter progressed remarkably. With the help of YCS, Angela’s mother was able to get a job and an apartment and the family was ready to live together again.
When the apartment was secured, members of NCJW Bergen County Section generously contributed to this effort by donating furniture and household goods to complete the apartment. Since Angela’s mother was starting from scratch she did not have anything to make her place a home.
Angela was able to attend YCS camp this summer and has been going home to spend weekends with her mother. This has been extended to week-long stays – and soon she will be joining her mother to live full-time. Arrangements have been made to allow her to continue in the school she attended in the past. And through the new YCS Aftercare Program, YCS will be able to continue working with Angela and her mother even after they leave YCS. Everyone is very excited and hopeful.
Because of the wonderful response to this family, YCS has started a program to continue collecting useable furniture and household goods for the older children who have to move out of YCS facilities and find places to live on their own.
Edna Lewitz, Adele Plotkin, Bernice Pollack and Leslie Schlesinger chair the NCJW BCS committees that work with the Youth Consultation Service Holley Child Care and Development Center in Hackensack and Kilbarchan Residential Treatment Center in Paterson.
HOLLEY SUCCESS STORY
Jenny** came to the YCS Holley Childcare and Development Center when her mother became gravely ill with full blown AIDS. Jenny was the oldest of five children, and her biological grandmother tried to care for all of the children but was unable to due to her drug addiction. All four of Jenny’s siblings, who were much younger, were adopted, but Jenny was deemed 'too old' and was sent to the Holley Center. When she arrived, she was so angry and hurt that no one - not even her own family or an adopted family - wanted her. Through the love and patience of the Holley Center staff, Jenny came to realize she was worthy of love and had so much to offer. YCS found Jenny a wonderful foster family where she lived with this one family for the remainder of her childhood.Jenny recently contacted the Holley Center. She is now a 31-year old woman who is a claims adjuster in a Philadelphia suburb and is married to wonderful man who is an auto mechanic. They have two beautiful daughters ages 4 and 5. Jenny contacted the Holley Center to see if there was any information in her file about her siblings. She had been trying to re-connect with any members of her biological family. The Holley Center was able to provide Jenny with enough information for her to eventually locate two of her siblings - a sister in Trenton and a sister in upstate New York.
Jenny told staff that in retrospect her time at the Holley Center saved her life. She felt she was given a new chance at life through the help of the Holley Center. Jenny now volunteers at a Children's Center outside Philadelphia as a mentor for children without parents. She told the staff at the Holley Center that the most important lesson she hopes to teach her own children is to always believe in yourself!
** not her real name.
Ruthie Harper
Co-Executive Director
YCS Foundation
SHELTER OUR SISTERS CLIENT STORIES
RebeccaA veteran with five years service in the military and several deployments and decorations under her belt, Rebecca did not envision civilian life to be a greater battle: having her life threatened by her new boyfriend. Shelter Our Sisters (SOS) provided a sanctuary, and a plethora of support. Thus regenerated, Rebecca needed little push to re-establish her life. Counseling and support groups reinforced her innate independence, and she soon moved into on of SOS’ transitional homes where she could enjoy safety. With the help of the career counselor, she created a portfolio that highlighted her military achievements and transitioned into a civilian career in corrections that capitalized her credentials.
Catherine
When Catherine first arrived at SOS, she was bruised not only physically, but emotionally. Her self-esteem was diminished, and she had little faith in her abilities to provide a life for her family her children could be proud of. Dedicated counselors helped Catherine recognize the accomplishments she had overlooked: working full time while being an exceptional mother to her two children, who also suffered the repercussions of the abuse. Catherine had left school in the fourth grade, and therefore heavily emphasized education to her children. She is now attending a GED course, an ESL class to refine her proficiency, and is working a part-time retail job in addition to her full-time administrative position in a hospital. Most importantly, she learned she can be a wonderful parent on her own.
Nadine
Nadine, an 8 year old girl came to Shelter Our Sister's emergency shelter with her mom and two baby brothers, ages two and one. She was a witness to repeated domestic violence in her home. When the family came to the shelter, her mom could barely walk because her abuser had broken her legs. The 8 year old became the ongoing caretaker to the two baby brothers as well as emotional support for mom. She did her chores without complaining, but often expressed her wishes and dreams of being able to play like a little girl. The one place where she felt she was in control of her life was in the Art Therapy room. The therapist actively worked on building a level of trust to help her increase her ability to express her feelings about the abuse she, her mom, and brothers had endured. The therapist worked on building her self-esteem and a sense of empowerment through creative art projects as well as play therapy sessions. She began to resolve feelings of fear and depression and increased the level of trust in her mom’s efforts to keep her family safe. Nadine felt good again to do her "job" as an eight year old child.
Thomas
Thomas came to Shelter Our Sister's emergency shelter with his mom at age15 year.
His first day, The Art Therapist spotted him sitting in a tree behind the house. They spoke and reluctantly, he began meeting with the therapist, saying very little, and mostly in whispers. After a while he started sharing thoughts and feelings and things that were important to him. She validated all that he shared and encouraged him to tell her about King Kong, the film, and the misunderstood main character he seemed to identify with. After watching the movie together, he was offered clay to use to create King Kong with his own hands and place him in a three-dimensional environment. With rocks, branches and moss and the child created a "home" for King Kong. As they worked together, he was able to talk more about how difficult it was for him at home, when his parents were fighting. He became invisible and he didn’t have a voice. King Kong was the start of regaining his voice. He began creating many more clay figures, and was encouraged him to use them to tell stories. He started designing cartoons, and used his characters in these stories, but now he gave them voices. His creations communicated with each other and, us, the readers. The child’s self-esteem was strengthening and he began believing in himself. He proudly was able to share his work with his mom and he was able to communicate his needs to her.
He found his voice.